Who should read this chapter? All parents.
Summary: All children need goals to focus on. College could be one of these goals for ALL children. We should ALL encourage our children to go to college. This is our expectation of them. Discuss this with them at an early age so that when they are in the first grade, they already know that all of this schooling will be to prepare them for college. Save your money because college will be expensive. Even if you think you can't afford it, save as much as you can to supplement financial aid.
As a university professor, parents often ask me for advice about a good college. It is unfortunate that all youngsters do not attend college. Youngsters need future goals. Parents should provide goals for their children. College should be one of these goals for ALL children. Anticipating college will encourage them to work harder in elementary, middle and high school. ALL children should be encouraged to go to college.
If you've already decided that your son or daughter will go to college, that's terrific. So before we discuss picking the right college, let's first talk about going to college versus not going to college.
In the ideal world, everyone should go to college. You learn a lot in high school but you learn more in college. Simply put, it is better to learn more than to learn less. There is an old saying that goes; to get a good job, you need a good education. True, but if everyone has a good education, it does not guarantee you a good job. But even if you have an average job, it is still better to have a good education, and a college education is better than a high school education. College is about learning things like chemistry, literature, physics, foreign language, calculus, etc. Do these things help us in everyday life? Mostly no. But a college education is also an education in life. Through higher studies of the arts, sciences and humanities, our experiences are broadened. We learn to be more appreciative and tolerant of other viewpoints. We become less prejudiced and more respectful of others. When teenagers spend their lives on the streets, they become "street smart". A college education is a broader exposure to life making a person "life smart".
A college education also results in a different type of social exposure. Many of us meet our future spouse during the years around graduation from high school. Would it be preferable to meet your spouse on a college campus or at a night club? Going to college increases the likelihood that your spouse will also be a college graduate. When I was in college I used to hear jokes about girls who came to college for an "MRS" degree; in other words, to find a spouse. I used to think that was ridiculous, but now I realize that this is very important. Don't overemphasize this because we don't want this to become the sole purpose of going to college. The importance of this factor (don't underestimate this either) should be kept to ourselves as parents.
Meeting your spouse on a college campus does not guarantee a happy marriage. Nothing guarantees this. But I have to admit that most of my friends have met their spouses in college and nearly all of them are still happily married today.
Even if you plan to work at a job that does not require a college education, college is still a good idea. If one washes cars for living, having a college education provides a background for one to be better at investing wisely, paying taxes wisely, deciding on renting or mortgaging and a college education makes it more likely to get promoted. Sometimes it's the general knowledge that is important in addition to qualifying for a job. For example, one of the great advantages of going to medical school, even if I decided not to practice medicine, is that I understand how the body works in sickness and in health. I understand how to take care of my family if they become ill. I understand human behavior and child development better so I can raise my children better. I can do all of these things better because of what I learned in college and medical school even if I decide to work at a sporting goods superstore (which is what I would like to do when I "grow up").
If you think you can't afford college, we'll discuss this in later chapters. Most parents already know that college is best for their children. For those parents who did not believe this, hopefully I've convinced you that college will be good for your children. First of all, you must convince your children to go to college. They are most impressionable when they are young, so tell them this when they are young. Tell them that they are going to college and that college is good for them. College will help them to be smarter, better and get a good job that they will like more with a greater opportunity for promotion. Give them this message frequently. Burn this message into their mind.
When the family watches college sports on TV, parents should make comments like, "I hear that university is a good school. Maybe you can attend college there." Whenever I watch my university alma mater play basketball, football, volleyball, or any sport, I tell my children, "That's where dad went to college. Maybe you'll go there some day." There is a large university complex just off the freeway in my town. The athletic dome arena and baseball stadium are easily visible from the freeway as we pass by. Graduations are held in the dome at this university. As we pass by, I tell them, "Here's where you're going to graduate when you've completed college."
My daughter in the first grade had a student teacher in a master's degree program who was part of their teaching team. This teacher graduated with her master's degree that year and she invited us to her graduation. We took the children to the graduation ceremony inside the dome. My children were initially impressed, but quickly became bored. We stayed till the end and although boredom had set in, I think that exposing them to this graduation ceremony gave them an idea of what to expect in their own lives.
The more exposure children can get to a university, the less foreign it will seem and they will accept it better. I remember the first time I set foot on a university campus was when I was in high school. I remember feeling that it was very foreign. I wasn't sure I would be able to fit in on a college campus, let alone do well. On several occasions during a free weekend, I have taken our children to the university campus on a little tour. I showed them the different buildings and what types of courses are generally taught in those buildings (engineering, chemistry, political science, business, medicine, etc.). I took them to the library and showed them how big it was compared to their elementary school library and our community library. The children were clearly impressed. Visits such as this make the idea of college more familiar to them. This makes them feel more comfortable with the idea of going to college.
One of the elementary school teachers asked me if I could arrange for her class to come to the hospital on a field trip. This was easily arranged, but I asked the teacher why they selected the hospital. It turns out that the teachers have trouble thinking of creative and new places to take the kids on field trips. After the museum, aquarium, symphony, culture center, movie theater, plays and the hospital, new ideas were hard to come by. I suggested that they go on a field trip to see the university campus. I suspect that there are many kids like me who have never seen a university campus. The thought of going to college might be more acceptable to them if the university campus became more familiar to them. The theme of the field trip would be to encourage all the students to eventually go to college. Other teachers commented that they thought this was a very good idea. If your child's elementary school class has not gone on a field trip to a college campus, suggest it to the teachers.
Your children should go to college. Convince them of this when they are young. It should be their expectation during their youth that when I graduate from high school, I will go to college.